who can remember last night, let alone the past few months... lets examine shall we?
Naughty Ironic drunk puppet photos....How embarrassing for me.
One requirement of a successful evening is traveling with the right pack of goons. These ones are more than suitable for a girl like me
If you think this man would approach you on the street, grab you by the ear and force you to take Jager shots with him, you are completely correct. And yes, he is rolling around town with an ex roadie for Motley Crue.
Everybody in San Francisco IS hotter than you. It's a fact. I lived there for like five months and I was better looking in those five months than I've ever been in my whole life. Just being there makes you radiate sexy vibes.... see?
No one Should be allowed back into public after going to Hard French... too much day drinking and dancing can make you act a fool.
What do you expect when you roll up to some house on the corner of hell and South east NOWHERE to play a house show? Well one thing is for sure you can expect most of your friends not to make it there because nobody drives. Not to mention everybody got day drunk because today happened to be one of the 20 days a year it's not completely depressing outside in Portland. But based on my recent research these are the things you can count on.
1. You will split a bottle of wine, very quickly, with one of your friends. You will chain smoke in the back yard and only watch a couple of songs by each band before you play. You will smoke weed right before you play.
2. After smoking said weed you feel the power of a thousand Steve Croppers take ahold of you, and you play one of the best shows of your life. Not because you were good, but because it was groovy. and because you passed a joint to the crowd.
3. When you're done playing you'll be drinking a glass of water and hand it to your friend to have her take a drink and exclaim "Ew! what the fuck is this?"
4. While you're loading out you'll pass some guy peeing outside. He'll tell you mid-whiz that he REALLY, REALLY, REALLY liked your show. He seems offended when your response is "you have your penis in your hand, sir."
ok. so what the fuck? We were standing on the street getting ready to shred when some dudes come up to us and ask us if we'd like to use their van. This is how the night begins. Use the van we did, embarrass himself... he would. Guess what dummy, i don't care about your band. I also don't care about your psychedelic ukulele side project. Meanwhile, don't expect me to not laugh when you want to have a conversation about how great tonight's turn out was for your show because I was there. There were like twenty people at best and 15 of them spent all night sitting outside texting and chain smoking. and just in case you're still wondering... no my friends and i would not like to have sex with you tonight... PASS.