Olive Garden... HELL NAH Applebees.

What do you expect when you roll up to some house on the corner of hell and South east NOWHERE to play a house show? Well one thing is for sure you can expect most of your friends not to make it there because nobody drives. Not to mention everybody got day drunk because today happened to be one of the 20 days a year it's not completely depressing outside in Portland. But based on my recent research these are the things you can count on.

1. You will split a bottle of wine, very quickly, with one of your friends.  You will chain smoke in the back yard and only watch a couple of songs by each band before you play. You will smoke weed right before you play.

2. After smoking said weed you feel the power of a thousand Steve Croppers take ahold of you, and you play one of the best shows of your life. Not because you were good, but because it was groovy. and because you passed a joint to the crowd.

3. When you're done playing you'll be drinking a glass of water and hand it to your friend to have her take a drink and exclaim "Ew! what the fuck is this?"

4. While you're loading out you'll pass some guy peeing outside. He'll tell you mid-whiz that he REALLY, REALLY, REALLY  liked your show. He seems offended when your response is "you have your penis in your hand, sir."